Does the Dog Die? A Brief Review of Shining City, By Seth Greenland
When I travel, I like to bring along a few reliable books, which usually means books by authors who have made me smile in the past. On my most recent vacation, I took books by Julia Glass, Jenny Shortridge, Mary Doria Russell and, reviewed here, Seth Greenland.
In discussing The Bones a few months ago, I praised Greenland for giving depth to even his most minor characters. I have a place in my heart reserved for authors who treat their characters with compassion and give them great complexity. Even a villain has an internal logic that comes from somewhere other than an inherent evil. And in Shining City, Greenland’s villains all make sense as people instead of being cardboard cut-outs. While Shining City’s protagonist, Marcus Ripps, is not the most complex man in fiction, he’s got dimension — as does his wife, his son, his mother-in-law, his attorneys, his competitors, his boss, and his “business associates.”
About those business associates — they’re hookers. Early in the story, Marcus loses his job as a factory manager. His wife, Jan, owns a failing boutique, and their middle-class life is about to disintegrate in a flood of debt and over-extension. Conveniently, Marcus’s estranged brother dies, bequeathing to Marcus a business known as Shining City drycleaners, which is really a front for an escort service. In desperate need of both income and validation, regardless of source, Marcus takes over this little goldmine, eventually bringing in Jan as his partner and her mother as their bookkeeper. Of course, this is not a simple business, and the unique twist that Marcus gives it is cause for some of the humor. Greenland keeps the story moving, and I was sorry to see it come to an end.
The only problem I had with Shining City was the appearance of a competitor in the escort service business. I keep mentally “fixing” her interactions with Marcus, which seemed like they could have been mutually beneficial while still allowing Greenland to proceed with the rest of the story as planned. Every novel asks us to suspend belief in at least one spot, but my brain couldn’t let go of this particular passage. That’s not a flaw, however, it’s just an observation. As with The Bones, I strongly recommend this book. If you have to pick between the two, in fact, I suggest Shining City.
As for animals, there is a terrier named Bertrand Russell who shows up periodically and comes to no harm. The death of a goldfish is mentioned in passing, and Marcus feels as if a coyote is following him. So this book is completely SAFE for animal lovers. Enjoy!
Does the Dog Die? A Brief Review of Dumbfounded, by Matt Rothschild
All books should be this much fun to read.
I picked up Matt Rothschild’s slightly-fictionalized-but-mostly-true autobiography with some trepidation. No, it wasn’t that he played with a few situations in order to make them read better — since he’s not Winston Churchill or some other historical figure, I’m not a purist about the details. My question was whether he’d turn out to be whiny. And he wasn’t. Instead, he was very, very funny in describing the misadventures of his sometimes poignant childhood.
Matt’s mother gave him to his grandparents to raise, but that doesn’t mean he was unwanted. He was very much wanted by those very grandparents. Matt frantically whips out one anecdote after another about the 19-room Manhattan apartment, the occasional questions about his parents, his acting out in school and resulting expulsions, being singled out for being Jewish, the chauffeur, the bossy butler, his monster of a mother, and the questions as to whether he was gay (or bisexual — as he humorously put it when he speculated that perhaps the occasional Cindy Crawford fantasy was more about greed than interest in women). And yet his eccentric grandparents, Sophie and Howard, gave him the foundation all children need, that of knowing they are loved and valued no matter what (and Matt gave them plenty of “what” to overlook). That foundation in turn allowed him to make a courageous stand toward the end of the book, when he did something that one of my favorite people lacked the cojones to do when faced with a similar decision.
So yeah, I am now a member of the Matt Rothschild fan club. I don’t just like him as a writer, I also like him as a person. Do I recommend this book? Of course!
This blog exists for animal lovers who don’t want to read about unpleasant incidents involving animals. Dumbfounded is completely SAFE for such readers. There is a dog, Static, who is loved despite his imperfections and Matt’s assumption that Static likes other people better. But Matt takes responsibility for Static, showing that he did indeed learn some important lessons from his grandparents.
Does the Dog Die? A Brief Review of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith
First up, I have two very strong objections to this book, a rewrite of Jane Austen’s classic Pride and Prejudice into a rather juvenile goof.
Objection #1: Everyone knows Mr. Darcy is a werewolf. Come on, Seth. You screwed this up big time. If you were going to do this, you could have at least done it right. And now I’m to understand that someone else has written Sense and Sensibilities and Sea Monsters? No, no, no, a thousand times no! Here are the correct match-ups of Austen and monsters:
- Pride and Prejudice and Werewolves
- Emma and Zombies
- Sense and Sensibility and Shapeshifters
- Persuasion and Sea Monsters
- Northanger Abbey and Vampires
- Mansfield Park and Witches
Get it right, people!
Objection #2: Seth over-edited the beginning. Granted, Austen often starts slow, but in the early pages, Mr. Darcy makes these weird comments that make me think, “who is this guy, how did he get here, and why is he sitting around spouting random, out-of-context, rude remarks?” Fortunately, this is a temporary problem, and anyone familiar with Austen’s original story will be able to fill in the blanks. But still … the guy isn’t given his due as a werewolf, and then he’s also the weirdo in the corner who blathers autistically? Not right, Seth!
These two objections aside, this is a wonderful book. I loved it, I laughed at it, and I recommend it. Only a prig wouldn’t enjoy it. In fact, it was recommended by a woman I consider to be one of the most devoted and knowledgeable Jane Austen scholars not employed by a university. So buy it. Make Seth rich and further his career. The fact that he mucked up Darcy’s werewolfishness becomes a detail once you get into the story.
And as this blog exists for the purpose of warning people about books in which animals are harmed or neglected or otherwise meet bad ends, I have to get serious. There are lots of horses, and since they are often the key to people escaping the zombies, they are worried about and protected. That’s not to say there’s never horse on the menu in Zombieland, but it’s referenced, not shown. There are also deer, who are dear to the Bennet girls. They’re not harmed, either. So this book is SAFE for animal lovers.
And Darcy is a werewolf, dammit!
Does the Dog Die? A Brief Review of Autobiography of a Fat Bride, by Laurie Notaro
I’m trying to remember which friend said she loved Laurie Notaro. This is driving me crazy.
And Laurie Notaro has potential to drive a person crazy. She is hilarious and observant, but I think if I ran into her on my annual pilgrimage to Phoenix, I’d say “great book, Laurie” and leave it at that. She’s intense. And that’s not a criticism, but it’s something to keep in mind while reading this book. It’s not a sit-down-and-read-it-all-Saturday-afternoon book, it’s more of a keep-in-your-purse-and-read-a-few-pages-at-a-time-while-in-line book. And it really does lend itself to short spurts of reading, because it’s written as a series of 2 to 6 page essays.
Laurie has an impossible mother, a mind-boggling grandma, a sweet but very languid husband, weird neighbors, sisters (and thanks again to my brothers for being boys instead girls), pets, a job, and a body that might qualify her to be a plus-size model were she so inspired.
At her wedding reception, she ejected the videographer who thought the entire event had been planned just so he could play at being dictator. That alone is reason to love her. And how can you not giggle at someone who writes: “it looks like Stevie Wonder and Bo Derek jumped you in an alley and gang-braided you”? On the other hand, there were a few essays that did not enrich my life, to put it mildly. But most were fun. I would recommend this to anyone except stick-in-the-mud types. You know who you are.
As for animals, there are a very few unpleasant images, but nothing that’s likely to stay with you. And I don’t believe she really forgot to feed her dog – first, dogs don’t let you forget that, and second, she exaggerates so much that I believe she said that for effect. Still, Notaro is outrageous for effect, and the animals fall into her line of sight occasionally. I’m going to declare this book SAFE for animal lovers, but promise not to take her literally, okay?
(Very) Odds and Ends
It’s another link day — cats, cooking, and common sense healthcare.
First, let’s look at the cats. Specifically, let’s look at 1,000 pictures of cats. Some of these animals are absolutely gorgeous.
As for cooking, a question that comes up now and then — and especially now, in the shaky economy– is whether certain items we consider panty staples are cheaper to make at home than to buy at the grocery store. An article on slate tells us one woman’s experience making bagels, cream cheese, yogurt, jam, crackers, and granola. She evaluates not just cost, but taste. The results might not be what you expect. I know I was surprised by one item in particular.
Finally, there’s common sense in health care, a hot topic these days with our devastatingly expensive “system” and the various thoughts on how to address it. This satire starring Fred Willard gets right to the point.
Does the Dog Die? A Brief Review of A Wild Sheep Chase, by Haruki Murakami
Surrealism usually doesn’t do much for me, and it took a while before I got into this book. But I’m glad I stuck with it, because it’s extremely funny in spots. It’s also hard to describe, but I’ll give it a shot.
An unnamed 20-something Japanese advertising executive inadvertently uses an image of a sheep that has great meaning to some sinister entities. As a result, he’s got to find that sheep! And sheep tend to look alike, although there are a few breed distinctions. (Actually, there are more than a few — check this comprehensive list, complete with pictures, from our helpful friends at Oklahoma State University.) But really, finding a single sheep? Not simple.
So Ad Exec frets about this for a while, at which point his helpful girlfriend gets involved and they take a leisurely approach, even though they only have 30 days total before the dire consequences occur. And weird things happen, and there’s symbolism and self-discovery and growth, blah-de-blah-de-blah. I think this is a good book, but I’m not one to make a sales pitch for surreal literature. Amazon has 113 reviews, 92 of which are 4 star or better. I’ll defer to my fellow readers there. Yeah, I know, I’m supposedly doing book reviews. Some are easier than others, and I don’t get paid to do the hard ones, so I’m punting this time.
As for animals, Ad Exec has a cat for whom he makes arrangements before taking off on his quest, so he’s fine. The cat even has a couple of funny bits. An elderly border collie shows up, to no real effect. And the sheep mill around and act like sheep. Of course they have more complex personalities than most of us realize, but a lot of animals are like that — ciphers until we get to know them. Anyway, this book is entirely SAFE for animal lovers.
Does the Dog Die? A Brief Review of Bachelor Brothers’ Bed & Breakfast, by Bill Richardson
I have to thank my Internet friend, Karen from Nova Scotia, for this little gem. And it’s little–only 152 pages. But it’s packed, with hardly a wasted word and at least one quotable phrase per page. I loved it!
Narrated by 50-something fraternal twins Virgil and Hector and a few of their guests, the book takes us to a remote town on a forested Canadian island, where Virgil and Hector operate a B&B for bibliophiles. In fact, some guests visit simply in order to read Proust without distractions. Some of the stories are sad, some wildly hilarious. For example, there’s the man whose office goes on a retreat (is there anything so vile as the office retreat?), leaving him in the woods to talk to the trees — one of which orders him to “get the hell out!” Then there’s the ne’er-do-well cousin who, after an epiphany, “spent the rest of his days, and the rest of his income, traveling the world, seeking out musical eggcups. He picked them up in Istanbul and Paris, in Geneva and Beirut.” Waffle, the brothers’ cat, and Mrs. Rochester, the parrot they inherited from their mother, hunt mice together, with Mrs. Rochester calling “kittykittykitty” when she spots one. I laughed out loud about every other page.
This is great book for animal lovers. Mrs. Rochester has one salty phrase in her vocabulary, which she uses at some of the most inopportune moments. There are also some very happy chickens, a music-critic Pekingese named Valentine, and a vast assortment of other pets. The only sad thing that happens is a brief mention of a parrot — not Mrs. Rochester — who died elsewhere. Plus, Waffle is a mighty huntress of small prey. But I have no qualms about recommending this book as SAFE for animal lovers, including and maybe especially bird lovers. Enjoy!
Dance, Dance, Dance! (And Update from the Groundcover Wars)
I missed my Wednesday posting because of work, I have a stack of books ready to be reviewed, and I want to write about dance. For this, I blame/credit my friend Dana. But more on that below.
First, last spring I wrote about planting several groundcovers in hopes they would overtake the useless grass, which I hate mowing. Well, folks, we have a winner: Creeping Jenny. In my back yard, it’s more like Galloping Jenny. A tiny plant in a 2-inch by 2-inch pot took over a space that is roughly 8 square feet. I love it! It can be invasive, which is fine. I’ll kill it where I want to plant other plants, and keep it everywhere else. I have the Golden variety, which is less invasive and, to my mind, more interesting. I’ve planted four of these in my tiny front yard, hoping that by next summer, my grass can be handled with mere weed-whacking.
Now, on to dancing! It’s a cold, cruel world, filled with wars and the military troops we use to fight those wars. The best soldiers are trained in a variety of skills. For example, from Pundit Kitchen:
Okay, so that’s pretty silly. But is it sillier than dancing scientists? As I mentioned, in another context, my friend Dana linked to the AAAS annual “Dance Your PhD Thesis” competition. This was the best, or so I thought. I especially like the guy who’s supposed to be the free cell or random particle or whatever:
Finally, from my friend Terri, we have Frosty, a dancing bird. There are several Frosty videos, but I chose this one because he seems happiest and most spontaneous here:
Mmmm, Bacon!
God made bacon because he loves us and wants us to be happy.
Yes, I’m still an agnostic. Don’t be such a literalist — the point of that statement is obvious: bacon is wonderful.
I made spaghetti carbonara for dinner last night, and it reminded me of how much I do love bacon. In a normal week, I stop at having three strips of it at breakfast on Saturday, but that’s just because I also love my arteries and don’t wish to clog them any more than I already do.
The wonderfulness of bacon has made the news in a number of ways recently. For example, a 115-year-old woman enjoys bacon regularly. If it’s good enough for the oldest person in the United States, it’s good enough for me! Of course, she has forsworn alcohol, cigarettes, and sex. Hmm. I’m not a smoker ….
Speaking of alcohol, the Brits have shown that bacon sandwiches cure hangovers. Thanks, British scientists! That is most welcome information.
Closer to home, an undisclosed location near San Francisco was the site of the recent Bacon Camp. I love this article because it mentions bacon-flavored dental floss, links to a recipe for bacon ice cream, has pictures of bacon sculpture, and shows buttons with amusing bacon-related slogans. Missing, however, was “bacon is a vegetable,” which appeared on a t-shirt in the most recent season of Top Chef.
Finally, would Chocolate Bacon Cupcakes have won a challenge on Top Chef? Maybe, maybe not. But if you want to try them at home, here is the recipe. I’ve had a peanut butter cupcake with bacon bits in the frosting, and it was awesome. I wonder if chocolate would be as good. Maybe I should make these and find out.
About
This is a picture of Priscilla, who lived to be an old lady cat of 19 1/2 and passed away on July 21, 2008. As Dave put it the next day, she was a great cat. I was privileged to adopt her in 1994, when her first family moved overseas and decided they couldn’t take her along. I don’t know if there’s an afterlife or a real “Rainbow Bridge” or any of that. But love lives on, and so I would like to dedicate this site to Priscilla and my first two cats, Hillary and Rabbit.
Like most blogs, this one includes random thoughts and observations, but its primary purpose is to provide book reviews for animal lovers. Please feel free to add comments or make suggestions of books that are animal-friendly.
